Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Hatin On Teens...

Yet another reason I don't have kids....they turn into teens...teens that murder you with a damn hammer. Ya'll this teen (Tyler Hadley) who will now be charged as an adult, killed his parents and then left their bodies locked in the master bedroom. He then decided to throw a damn house party and invited 40-60 guests. One of those guests gave an annonymous tip about the parents still being in the house. Hence the reason the cops showed up at the front door where the lil pussy was all nervous and panicky. When the parents were found they were in the master bedroom, partially covered with household items and a hammer between them...which is suspected to be the murder weapon.

Is the world f'ing with me??? Why in the hell did this lil punk find it necessary to kill his parents?? Damn dude, you should've just run away if they were that terrible, but murder??? Son you are lucky Harlem isn't yo momma, cause I woulda bust your ass if you came at me with a hammer.

Lesson Of The Day: I don't know how many times I have to say it ya'll...DO NOT HAVE KIDS!

P.S. Today's post will not have a picture as I do NOT want this lil shits picture anywhere on my site...if you're curious, google him.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Hey Tokyo....Are ya'll for realz????

This may be old news to some of you nerdz, but your girl doesn't get out much. There is a fad in Tokyo called the Bagel Head, I guess it's been around for a year or so. Anyways, please try not to projectile vomit on your neighbor....

A Bagel Head is someone who injects their forehead with saline while they depress the center of their forehead. The saline slowly drips in for two hours and will form the shape of a bagel. Your head bagels can even be shaded blue or green with food coloring and molded into any shape. This fine young man in the photo above wanted a perfect replica of his ass on his forehead. These saline injections aren't permanent and only last for 24 hours. So far everyone who has created this look has had no adverse affects and their skin has returned back to normal the next day...if you ask me I think stretching out your forehead would eventually cause premature wrinkles....yuk!

Question for the crazies out there....Will Lady CaCa try to take the credit for this fad, I mean she did start the whole bone prosthetic movement...fortunately Gaga, no one was Born This Way!

Lesson Of The Day: Foreign objects should NOT be injected into the body.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Hatin On Off Leash Dogs...

I saw the most horrific thing this weekend ya'll and it not only saddens me, but pisses me the frig off. I was at the park and it is an ON LEASH park. I was sittin there with my friend, Pissa Pants, enjoyin some creamed ice. This couple walked by with their pit bull and it was right by there side and whenever a dog would come near they would jerk on the leash to keep the dog in check. It even had a choke collar on.

MINUTES LATER: This lady runs by us yelling, "My Baby, My Baby". This guy starts runnin saying that someone is stealin him. My friend and I are lookin around confused. This lady drops to her knees in front of us grasping the air screaming "My Baby". We asked her what was wrong and she got up and took off runnin. So what do me and Pissa Pants do...we get up and follow. I thought that someone stole this ladys kid. I'm thinkin, beyotch stand up and go get yo damn babe. As we got closer, it then seemed like someone stole her dog (obv no one spoke very good english). There was a swarm of people surrounding an SUV. Whose SUV do you ask...the pit bull owners. Apparently, the pit bull attacked the ladies lil shit...zu. We decided to wait and gawk cause the cops were called and a fire truck came (I love a man in uniform). The lady's friend walked up with the lil dog and one of its eyes was missing and bloody and the other one must have been punctured cause it was there but also covered in blood.

The cops were questioning each party and everyone was of course being rude to the pitbull people. There were even people calling their lawyers to defend the Shit's owners. Now me being the super observant person I am noticed the lil dog had no collar, leash, or harness on. When your dog gets attacked the last thing you would think of is to take the damn collar off. I would bet anyone $100 that that dog ran up to the Pit Bull. It's an ON LEASH park bitches, technically that's what you get.

I do believe it was HORRIBLE for the Pitties parents to run away, especially cause they had an 8 year old son with them. So that's perfect, teach your damn lil hoodlum to run instead of takin responsibility for your actions. I did not stay for the outcome, but unfortunately I am afraid the Pit Bull will probably be put to sleep even though I KNOW those people had that dog in check. They couldn't help some idiot didn't follow the On Leash rule.

Lesson Of The Day: Dogs are unpredictable, it's called "On Leash Dog Area" for a reason. Also, when a dog seems aggressive, or you did not ask for permission...DO NOT think it is ok for your mutt to come sniff mine!